With broken hearts, we share the loss of Raphael Malcolm Mijares – our beloved son, brother, grandson, nephew, cousin and friend, on November 23, 2025.
Known as Rafa, he had many nicknames over the years: Baby Rafa, Lil Rafa, Faf/Fafa/Fafael, Gordo, Stuart, Ferguson/Fergie, Bird, Kuya, Turtle/Tortuga and more.
Rafa was born on December 24, 1998 at home in a tiny apartment at the UC Village in Berkeley, California. He attended elementary school in El Cerrito until his family moved to Sunnyvale in 2010. At Peterson Middle School, he proudly achieved Honor Roll and especially loved the extraordinary culinary arts program. Though he did not progress beyond high school, Rafa’s intellectual curiosity never waned and his brilliance sparkled even in dark times.
During his early 20’s, Rafa found great meaning and fulfillment serving the unhoused community in Boulder, especially because of the ongoing struggles he faced with mental health, addiction and homelessness. Rafa spent over two years working at shelters and as a Coordinated Entry case worker for the city. Long after leaving that work, he was recognized and appreciated around town by people he helped during that time.
Rafa was a lover of the natural world, music, art, graffiti, travel, cooking and many other things about life. He inspired his family and friends to be present to beautiful sunrises and sunsets. He loved hiking and communing with nature, often spotting hidden wildlife and other treasures. His laugh was contagious, and his smile turned most frowns upside down, even when he was struggling too.
His family and friends will miss him eternally and remember him always. His family acknowledges the complicated impact of Rafa’s life on those who knew and loved him. They encourage taking refuge in each other and the community, seeking professional resources as needed, and finding ways to let Rafa’s memory serve as a blessing in any way it can.
The following is an excerpt from his mother’s offering at the Boulder Morningstar Zen Center funeral service for Rafa on December 4:
“Death can come at any time. Our choices, the agency we have to exercise vigilance over our physical body, is tightly coupled with this birth-to-death timeline. Even a life lived with the utmost care can end in tragedy and heartbreaking timing.
Raphael, like many sentient beings, began walking a path paved with his autonomy long before I, as his mother, would have wanted. But like most everything in life, I do not control and cannot hope to protect forever everything I love. At 15, I started fearing for Raphael in such acute ways that I quickly learned the feeling of losing someone over and over again.
That fear cultivated a separation that became a safe place for me to exist. For a while, until inevitably this connection to my child and flesh was reactivated. After yet another period of estrangement and another dose of palpable fear about his imminent and untimely demise, we powerfully reconciled this summer. It was sweet and impermanent. In that time, I once again felt intimacy in silence, held hands, sang songs, and actively repaired some of what was broken between us.
My son suffered a little bit extra. Mental health and addiction issues consumed his adult life. But that did not stop him from thriving and serving others in the times he did, long stretches that gave me hope about his ability to persevere.
I offer my gratitude for the generosity flowing. The strength I am accessing is undoubtedly beyond me, or what any one of us can do on our own. We are not meant to do this alone. If there are any absolutes, I have been humbled by this one again and again.
May we be held by each other always. May the loneliness and struggles be alleviated by the love we make sure to share. Thank you.”
A celebration of life event is being planned for sunset on April 19, 2026 at Black’s Beach in Santa Cruz, CA – rain or shine. More details will be shared on social media.
I am so saddened by the life of such a big heart and soul.
I’m profoundly saddened by the loss of your son, Heather. I pray for your peace.
My heart is broken for your loss Heather. Rafa will forever be in my prayers.
My deepest condolences to Heather, Issa, Rafael and all of Baby Rafa’s extended family and friends.This is truly heartbreaking. May he rest in peace.
I am devastated. Reading about Rafa’s journey breaks my ♥️. This too much to bear. Mother Dear you gave 100% with addrd value raising both Smart Cookies. You, Issa and your extended family remain iin my prayers. Please accept my ♥️-felt Condolences. ❤️, always, Mrs. Rideaux, Rafa and Issa’s favorite Kin der gar ten teacher
I so remember Rafa as a ball of light and joy, running around Link Tv offices, and hanging freely with the big folks..May his soul’s journey continue to the beautiful wide open natural space he was always attracted to.
My most sincere and heartfelt condolences to the family. Fond memories of Heather the momma chasing little Rafa and Issa around Studio 3 during WL pledge, crazy and carefree. As I am writing this, Shiela Chandra arose on my playlist. “The ocean, your ocean refuses no river.” May he rest in peace.
I hold a special place in my heart for the afternoons I spent with Raffy and Issa while their mother and I were working at Link Tv. They were clearly special, beaming with energy and gentleness. My heart goes out to the family.
What a real and loving tribute to Rafa from a mother who loved Rafa for the person he actually was whether it was in times of light and wonder or other times of darkness. Rafa, I love you still and always will. Marianne Scifres
I’m so sorry for your loss. I remember him on the yard through a few different schools as I did yard duty. Your family were my neighbors. I always could see him on the playground with that beautiful hair. I can’t imagine your pain. So much love to you and your family. Xoxo Tins
So sorry to hear this, Heather. I fondly remember hearing about your kids. And your sharing your offerings in the notice above is such a lovely testament. Warmest hugs to you as all of his family comes together to celebrate his life.
My deepest most sincere condolences to you Heather and to family and friends. I am so very sorry for the loss of this young life. But the very best most essential part of him that is love, will be with you forever. RIP Rapha.
Growing up, I hadn’t been somebody who was blessed with a big support system or many real, authentic friendships. I’m blessed to say that one of those few friends that I DID have, was Rafa. And that just about made up for all else lacked. I’ll miss you my friend. I will always remember and appreciate the vast impact you’ve made in my life, and cherish that forever. Rest easy 🫶🏼
Whoa… Rafa was a great guy with a laugh that made you smile when you heard him. I hadn’t seen him in a while but this is one that totally took me off guard. My prayers go out to Heather , Big Rafa, and Assa
I’m so saddened to hear about this lose, he was an amazing person that I met in middle school and would hang out with all the time in school and after as well, so fun and funny and his laugh was contagious. Rest in Peace Rafa
My heart is broken for Rafa and his family. He was one of the first boys I coached many years ago. I loved his presence; that smile, that hair. Peace and love to him and to you all.
I’m stunned with this news! Sending so much love to Heather and Issa from Matt and me, Leo Hank and Sam.
I am Rafa’s paternal grandmother. I was there the day he was born. Heather and Raphael were living in off-campus housing. That evening there were Korean Christmas carolers. Newborn Rafa was held up in the window and the carolers were crying as he had been born on Christmas Eve. What a gift!
We had lots of contact up until Rafa turned 16. I would come up from Costa Rica and hang out, providing rides to or from school and to various activities. Going out to eat was always a treat. I also remember reading to both Rafa and previous brother Issa from a children’s book titled The Dark is Rising. His dad had read the same series when he was young, We also watched the Harry Potter movies together. When Rafa was in his early teens I introduced him to a hillarious comedy series title “Raising Hope.” He shared its season with his friends, which made me happy that I’d shared something that brought so much entertainment.
One of my last memories was giving him a ride from Sunnyvale to Grass Valley. He shared how much he liked Frank Sinatra. In my mind I thought “you’ve got to be kidding. My parents listened to him.” He explained Sinatra used real voice, no gimmicks to enhance it as is the practice in modern times given all the technological enhances. I was impressed. On that same trip we saw a “double-rainbow.” It was meaningful.
May you be in the light and colors of that double-rainbow now Rafa. As you now know for sure, death is but a passing and not an ending.
Love always, your grandma Sharon
I love you grandma🫶🏽
Here’s are a few ways to honor Rafa’s memory:
Volunteer at a shelter, donate food and extend compassion to those who are un-housed and struggling with mental health and addiction issues.
Assemble and distribute care kits to people living on the streets. Include travel-sized essential personal hygiene items such as toothpaste, toothbrushes, soap, deodorant, wet wipes, and feminine hygiene products.
Offer gratitude for sunrises, sunsets and everyday moments of natural wonder