Mary Nell Stuber died on October 1, 2025, two weeks shy of her 77th birthday. She was a warm, smart, curious, funny, intense, courageous person who led a rich and beautiful life. Born in Memphis on October 16, 1948, she hitchhiked to Colorado in her early 20s with a tiny backpack holding her three favorite record albums: Joni Mitchell’s Blue, Jefferson Airplane’s Surrealistic Pillow, and Pentangle. She moved through careers in real estate and insurance before finishing her working life at REI.
Mary was a passionate nature lover, birder, naturalist, storyteller, teacher, photographer, and adventurer, and a beautiful singer/guitarist. She shared a series of essays called Nature Wise—soon to be published as a book—with a community of readers, mixing her photography with an articulate and deeply-informed folksy eloquence about whatever interested her, often on travels through the Southwest and on birding expeditions. The title, Nature Wise, came from her practice of looking to nature for guidance when she was trying to understand her own life, including her cancer journey. She opened the eyes of many. One friend wrote that “Mary’s most extraordinary gift was sharing her knowledge and experiences with others—engaging us in the intricate and the simple rhythms of the natural world.”
She was a volunteer naturalist and raptor monitor for Boulder County and directed Boulder County Nature Association’s education program for six years. She belonged to the Rocky Mountain Canoe Club and the St. Vrain Photographic Society. She was a member of the Denver Women’s Chorus and then for 23 years, a member of Resonance Women’s Chorus in Boulder.
She carried an AA chip in her pocket for 39 years.
She is survived by her partner of 34 years, Sue Coffee, who loved her deeply, and Sue’s family, as well as by many friends and members of her community.
Mary lived with ovarian cancer for four and a half years. Huge gratitude to her oncologist, Dr. Sravanthi Ravulapati, and her team at Kaiser Rock Creek; the nurses in the Rock Creek infusion room; the staff at Trail Winds Hospice and The Natural Funeral; and to the singers of Resonance and Sound Circle for the circle of love and support that surrounded Mary and Sue during this cancer journey. A parting thought: ovarian cancer is often diagnosed late because its symptoms are vague and easily mistaken for other things. If something feels funky, pursue it with your doctor.
Mary embraced Taoist philosophy in the last few years of her life. She wanted to die gracefully and with gratitude. She was sincerely at peace as death approached, knowing that “nothing could be more natural,” that she was completing the circle of life that began with her birth. A downy woodpecker appeared at the window moments after her last breath.
Family and friends will join in a celebration of Mary’s life later this month.
Donations in her name can be made to Black Swamp Bird Observatory, the Southern Utah Wilderness Alliance, or the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition.
Dear Sue,
I didn’t know Mary well, but I certainly felt fondly towards her and enjoyed seeing her at Resonance rehearsals. Talia has told me a bit about her, and I especially like hearing how she LOVED birds, knew birds, and could tell a good bird story. She was a woman attuned to nature. The world was definately better with her in it—finding joy in birds and nature, deep love for you, and harmony in every note she sang. Peace to you.
Sue, Now I know why Mary had not responded to recent messages. I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you. You were an amazing couple – full of love, fun and adventure. Please know that I am thinking about you both. Ruth Przybeck
Sue, You may not remember me but just so you know. My heart goes out to you. I had the privilege of riding in your car as Mary directed you so we could see raptors during a raptor class through Boulder County. I also got to spend time with Mary on a birding walk at Walden. Mary was so nice. I am sorry for your loss.
Linda Garcia
When I moved to Colorado, I was fortunate to meet Mary and work with Mary at REI. Her stories of rafting, of birding, of hiking filled me with new images as I came to know these new Colorado mountains & rivers. My heart goes out to all Mary’s loved ones and friends.
Sue: I was privileged to work with Mary for several years in Boulder. She could always be counted on for an honest opinion tempered by wisdom and life experience. Her passion for inviting others to share her joy of nature was the catalyst for introducing many people to the outdoors. In her quiet and determined way, she was a force made stronger by the challenges she faced throughout her life. We ache for your loss but lead richer lives for having known her.
Is the Black swamp Obseratory on the shores of Lake Erie in Nothern Ohio?
I worked with Mary at REI in Boulder, and enjoyed reading her obituary. Mary was definitely a natural woman and pursued her own path in life and death.
RIP sweet Mary.